Unveiling My Latest Book

Thank you. Thanks. Please, please be seated. Thanks everyone. That’s very kind. Thank you everyone. I’m glad you could make it here on such short notice. I know your schedules are hectic and what little spare time you have is precious, so I’ll be as brief as possible.

[the squeal of a folding chair being dragged into place briefly fills the room]

As some of you may already know (thanks to a mix-up with a certain web page), I have released a new book.

[the room stirs and a few flashbulbs pop]

Uh-huh, I know, I know, many of you are as stunned as I am that a person such as myself, devoid of any journalistic background, could string together enough words to fill in a voter registration card, let alone a whole book, but trust me; this book contains actual content, with real words forming actual sentences – contrary to the unfounded rumors claiming that it’s really a byproduct of a feeble attempt to clean sesame seeds out of my keyboard.

[a knowing chuckle emanates from an unknown source]

But why here? Why have I gathered ya’ll at the Central State Hospital to officially announce the release of my new book rather than at a cozy bookstore or a warm coffee house?

Well, you see, it is here within the walls of this asylum where lunacy breathes life into my words. It is here where sanity gives way to reality and the shattering of perceptions is commonplace. I find this demented atmosphere most fitting for my work and, as the image of this imposing sanatorium shrinks in your rear-view mirror during the return to your perceived realities, you may find the connections outlined within the pages of this book are more familiar than you’re willing to accept.

[orderlies enter the room, chatter swells and several flashbulbs pop]

Once again, thank you for your support, it certainly means more to me than to you. Now if you’ll excuse me, it’s time for my afternoon treatment.

“Mental Notes – From the Brink of Reality” is available online at Lulu.com and amazon.com (soon) and is also available as a Kindle book.

The posting of any reviews (good, bad, or indifferent) would be greatly appreciated. Signed copies are available upon request (during regular visiting hours). We ask that while you’re leaving the facility that you please avoid making direct eye contact with any of the patients and, by all means, please DO NOT bare your teeth at them. It will be interpreted as a sign of aggression. Thank you, please continue moving along.